Here we are, less than a week away and I have no freak’n clue what to get a handful of people still. I don’t typically buy gifts for very many people. I’ve mainly focused on my fiancee and her son this year. But I would still like to get my parents something and a couple of other people. My ideas so far consist of a black infinite dimension full of nothingness.

I suppose before I go giving myself no credit at all, I did find a couple of Christmas cards already that I can use. If I’m honest I don’t even normally include a card with any gifts, not even gift cards. In the past I simply handed someone the gift card, said Merry Christmas, and went about my day. But this year I decided to spruce things up a bit and get some cards. My favorite card says something along the lines of “Happy Holidays, hope you enjoy the card, someone farted in the card isle and I could only hold my breath long enough to pick this one”. Haha. Not too bad, huh?

While trying to hunt down some gift ideas here in the WordPress community through other peoples blogs, I instead came across the idea for a coloring book with farting animals, which would PERFECT for my fiancee’s son (who I already have a gift for). Nevertheless, I sent the Amazon listing to my fiancee and asked if she could order it with her two day shipping. And if you haven’t guessed by now, I am one of those people that still finds farts funny. But not as funny as my fiancee who laughs uncontrollably every…single…time…she farts. Her laughing then causes her to fart more and it becomes what I like to call, the “giggle farts”.


Farting aside, I am still clueless as to gift ideas. When it comes to my parents and a couple of others, I really just don’t know what to get them. I know them well, but my creativity for gifts is just lacking. My thinking at this point will be to offer my parents a nice dinner out. They enjoy spending time with me and I know that it would probably mean a lot more to them than a gift card like I have done in the past. Though there is still that part of me that would like to get them something special and affordable, I may just settle for a dinner with them.

The other two people I have in mind include a friend of mine that I work with and a close friend to my family. And I really don’t know what to do for either of them. I try and try to think of things, but nothing comes to mind. I begin to wonder if it really is a guy thing because I feel like girls can always go out find the right stuff, buy it, and boom, they are done. Like what the hell!?!?! I walk into a store and wander around like an old senile man who’s family took their eyes off of me just long enough for me to get lost.

At the end of the day I will figure something out. I think that the pressure of needing to find something last minute will finally ignite a spark inside the small, dilapidated shack inside my head that should be manufacturing some creativity for me, but instead serves as place for homeless people to use the bathroom, and young rebel teens to spray some paint.