Yes, at the age of 28 I’m a bit off track when it comes to a hobby. I used to have a few hobbies that kept me busy back when I was single and had more free time. These days though, I feel like the closest thing to a hobby that I have is cleaning the house or washing the cars…

When I speak about a hobby, I’m not just referring to something that I enjoy doing, but something that I can do the way I want to do it. That’s to say I could include friends, family, or just fly solo. But once your in a serious relationship and you acquire additional responsibilities, it’s hard to balance those responsibilities with any sort of hobby. What’s worse for me is that my past hobbies that I loved so much, do require a decent amount of time if done properly.

There are three things I absolutely loved doing, and used to do all the time. I loved creating video content via Youtube, I was very passionate about live streaming via the popular streaming service, Twitch…and I’ve always enjoyed some fashion of writing, whether it’s creative short stories, or simply blogging. And while my WordPress site remains alive here in the community, it’s a mere candle light compared to the lighthouse it once was.

I struggle to find time to write the posts that are published on this site. Furthermore, this is the only outlet I have left to express myself and remain connected to the online world through something I consider a hobby. My blog started as a movie review site where I posted 2 or 3 times a week easily. I wasn’t making video content at the time, and I hadn’t even considered live streaming yet. So my review site was my full time hobby for a solid few months, and I had a blast sharing my thoughts with the online world about various movies I had seen. I’ve always enjoyed movies, and using my site I was able to connect with other movie lovers and read their opinions as well.

The downfall of my blog could be attributed to live streaming. I’ve always been a gamer, and when I learned that I could live stream my gaming experiences with others, I almost immediately jumped aboard. I started by streaming without any kind of camera that would actually show me. For the first 6 or so months of streaming, my viewers could hear me and see what I was playing, but they could not see me. Eventually I worked up the courage to purchase an entirely new and state of the art setup, which included webcams and even a green screen. My viewership began to grow much quicker as more and more people “showed up” to watch me. It didn’t take long for me to realize that I could play just about any game I wanted, because I was the true source of entertainment, not the games that I was playing. I loved telling jokes, acting crazy, and chatting with my viewers. The feeling was truly a natural high for me. And while many of my more loyal viewers often complimented me and advised me that I had the ability to make a bad day good for them, I don’t think any of them could ever understand what they meant to me. My viewers did more for me that I could have ever done for them. They gave me confidence to be my true self and even more, they helped me over come some of the dark parts of my past.

I gave up everything for my relationship though. With the exception of some posts here on this site, I don’t have time to stream, nor do I have the time to create video content. Making Youtube videos was an on and off part of my life, but I only got better and better at creating videos. My skills grew and my content quality kept rising. But to record video, edit, and upload it, all takes time…time that I no longer have while trying to run a business and start a real life with my new family.

I’m a happy person and I have a good life. I’m grateful to be in the position that I am with both my professional and personal life. I only wish I could find a hobby that I have time for and that I love just as much as the ones from my past. I suppose I can’t really try to force a hobby into my life, but my fingers are crossed that someday I’ll stubble upon something that brings that part of me back to life. Until then I’ll just focus on keeping everything else in order. I have a lot to live for, and I don’t want to lose some of the things that I’ve worked very hard for.